Fit, said loosely.

One of my favorite writers lived in Portland.  He sorta signified PORTLAND to me and to himself.  Organic, honest, thoughtful, creative, outdoorsy, natural, mountainous, architecturally stimulating, cool.  Portland, having visited once, took on a pretty strong pull to my sensibilities.
  I live in Raleigh.  Raleigh has been a hard fit, it has its special moments, but overall it has been tough.  So Asheville became my Portland.  I have wanted to move there for years.  Ess Gee and I have visited often, loved it often, hiked it often, dreamed about it often.  I just watched this interview where the Portland-living author moved to, of all places, D.C.  D.C.!  SOOO different than Portland.  But having heard his interview and having thought about it further...this person who identified himself so strongly with Portland, up and moved to a city that is very different than where his identity was and has made DC work and fit and have his being.  Hearing this oddly gave me freedom.  More freedom than I realized I was keeping from myself.
  I say, Raleigh is not my fit, Asheville is, but something about that interview made me wanna give up what I think "my fit" is.  Granted, I surely want to LIKE where I live.  And Raleigh is breaking me down:-), but I do want to leave my life open for more than I have been allowing myself.  I kinda wanna give over Asheville and say to God, anywhere, even if it's here:-).  It's like if he, who I thought was soooo Portland, can make a place like DC work, then I who am sooooo Asheville can make a place like Raleigh work:-).  Even Raleigh:).  I guess I don't want to be quite so rigid with my life because I want to leave it open for surprises...and freedom.
  And I guess if I think about it, I did make the move from San Diego to Chapel Hill, simply for fun.  I would like to revisit the girl who did that.  She got what I am talking about it:-).